"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."

She answered them, “Don't call me Naomi [Sweet]. Call me Mara [Bitter] because Shadday has made my life very bitter. I went away full, but Yahweh has brought me back empty.” (Ruth 1:20)

Naomi had left Moab after both her sons and her husband died. She heard that Yahweh had come to help his people and give them food so her and her daughters-in -laws set out along the road to Judah. She told her daughter-in-law's not to follow her back because she said, “My bitterness is much worse than yours because Yahweh has sent me so much trouble.” (Ruth 1:13)

A friend of mine sent me a note on some ponderings this week and asked, 'how do we drink from the cup that tastes bitter without growing bitter ourselves?'

It is pretty clear throughout the bible that we will experience hardships and trouble. Paul says in 2 Cor. 4:8, “We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair.”

In Matthew 20:22, Jesus answered His friends who asked to be at his right and left side, “You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am to drink?” They said to him, “We are able.” Jesus responded,  "My cup you shall drink;..."   Jesus was referring to His crucifixion.  

Naomi tasted bitterness at the death of her husbands and sons. It had left her barren of children and also with no hope of lineage under her husbands name. She told her daughters-in-law to turn back. She said, “Why should you go with me? Do I have any more sons in my womb who could be your husbands?... Go, because I am too old to get married again.” (Ruth 1:12)

In the midst of our trials and difficulties, when we look to Jesus, in the midst of bitter circumstances, we can taste the sweetness of Christ. 

Moses and the Israelites wondering the desert came to Marah [Bitter] and were thirsty.   The waters were bitter and one could not drink of them so Moses threw a branch into the waters and it made the bitter waters sweet. (Ex. 15:25)

As mentioned earlier, Jesus drank of the most bitter of cups.   What made these waters sweet?   Entering into the greater story of God which was His complete death on the cross that ultimately lead to His resurrection into life for all of us. It was the joy set before Him that He endured the cross.

For Naomi and Ruth, it was the kindness of God that turned the bitter waters sweet for them.  Even when we turn our back to God, He does not turn His back to us. The moment that Naomi set out back on the road towards God, He met her there with kindness. He gave her Naomi to take the journey with her. And they just happened to come back as the barley harvest began so there would be food for them.


When Ruth returned to Bethlehem and went out gleaning the fields, she just happened to end up in the fields of Boaz. Boaz gave Ruth tremendous favor. Ruth asked Him, “Why are you so helpful? Why are you paying attention to me? I am only a foreigner.” (Ruth 2:10)

When Naomi found out whose field that Ruth had been gleaning at with such tremendous favor, she saw it God's kindness behind it. Naomi said to her daughter-in-law, “May Yahweh bless him. Yahweh hasn't stopped being kind to people -living or dead. Then she told Ruth, “That man is a relative of ours. He is a close relative, one of those responsible for taking care of us.” (Ruth 2:20)

I can imagine the kindness of God overflowing into her life had to feel so much more sweet as she was in such desperate need of kindness and mercy. Throughout the book of Ruth, God's kindness shines through the pain and loss.

Life can be hard, sometimes mundane (like gleaning fields), disappointing, and with many painful difficulties that arise. But it is Jesus shining through that sweetens the waters when they taste bitter. He works through our difficulties and pain to give us a future and hope. Drinking from a bitter cup can be the fertilizer for soil that is rich and full of life.

Jesus is the branch the makes the bitter waters sweet. When we look to Him, we are not left barren and abandoned in our bitterness. He can bring life into the most bitter of circumstances.

Isaiah 54:1-5, "Sing with joy, you childless women who never gave birth to children.  Break into shouts of joy, you women who never had birth pains.  There will be more children of women who have been deserted than there are children of the married women," says Yahweh.

In Habakkuk 3:17-18, in the midst of tremendous hardship the prophet proclaims, “Even if the fig tree does not bloom and the vines have no grapes, even if the olive tree fails to produce and the fields yield no food, even if the sheep pen is empty and the stalls have no cattle –even then, I will be happy with Yahweh. I will truly find joy in God, who saves me.”

What matters is how we deal with the cup of bitterness we are handed. If we refuse the cup all together, we are refusing Him. I think of the banquet of wines in Esther.  Drinking of the cup at a banquet of wine means one is saying "Yes" to the person who prepared the glass.   When we refuse to drink and say "No" we are saying no to the one who prepared the glass.   We say 'yes' to drinking a bitter cup even when it tastes terrible because we love Him and look to Him to sweeten it.

Drinking the cup in a way that bears fruit starts with realizing all things permitted are allowed by God.  We can find what God wants from us in difficulties but we cannot control our situation or circumstances - we can only love God and others in whatever is brought to us.  

When Jesus was given the cross to carry, he put His arms around it and carried it with what strength He had out of love for His Father and looking forward to what will be.   When we embrace what has been given to us even though it is bitter, the loving-kindness of Jesus sweetens the water and makes our soil all the more rich.

How we choose to respond is up to us. Paul says in Philippians 4:8, "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things."   

I have a quote next to this verse that says, "The moment we permit evil to control our imaginations, dictate the way we think, and shape our responses, we at the same time become incapable of seeing the good and the true and the beautiful."   [1]

While circumstances we cannot control, we do have full control on how we choose to respond in them and to them.   If we choose to dwell on the evil, fall into self pity, complain, grumble and try to manipulate our circumstances, we will miss an opportunity to worship God.    We miss what we could have and will probably grow bitter.  

But if we use all circumstances to love, serve, and show mercy to others while humbly trusting God, we will be emptied of ourselves and grow in our capacity to love as we are filled with God.
 

“Make me ready for your return, as a bride makes ready for a groom” sings.

Paul clearly demonstrates this in the way that he responds to hardships. He tells the Corinthians in 2 Corinthians 6:4-7, “We have endured many things: suffering, distress, anxiety, beatings, imprisonments, riots, hard work, sleepless nights, and lack of food. People can see our purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, the Holy Spirit's presence in our lives our sincere love, truthfulness, and the presence of God's power.”

Ray Stedman writes in his book Authentic Christianity, “Christians must face life in the raw, just as any pagan will. The purpose of the Christian life is not to escape dangers and difficulties but to demonstrate that they are handled in a different way...

This power within was given to us for the very purpose of handling the afflictions which are our lot. We are exposed to them in order that we might demonstrate a different reaction than one which would come from a person of the world. Our neighbors, watching us, will find us difficult to explain, and it is only when we baffle them that we are likely to impress them with the advantage our faith gives. There will be a quality about us which can only be explained in terms of God at work. It must be evident that the power belongs to God and not to us.” [2]

By handling our difficulties and hardships in a different way than the world, it makes Christ evident in our lives. Also, it gives us the opportunity to partner with God even in the midst of our tribulations to show the loving-kindness to others who have never tasted of it.

This does not mean, however, putting a smile on your face and pretending everything is okay.  We cannot just try harder to be a good witness in difficult tribulation.   

It is not through our strength but His that we demonstrate that there is a different way. It is in the genuine overflowing joy of the Lord as our strength, leaning on Him and allowing Him to sweeten the waters which are bitter that demonstrates Christ.

In the midst of tremendous difficulty, Habakkuk looks to God and finds His joy in His loving-kindness. He goes on to proclaim in Habakkuk 3:17-19, “ I will truly find joy in God, who saves me. Yahweh Adonay is my strength. He makes my feet like those of a deer. He makes me walk on the mountains.”

Naomi, in the midst of all her pain, entered into the story of God and partnered with Him in His kingdom work. When she noticed that God's kindness and workings were evident in her gleaning at Boaz's field, she sent Ruth to the threshing floor to lay at his feet. In doing so, she was asking him to redeem her and Naomi.

One of the ways we embrace difficulties is looking forward to our eternal destination rather than setting our eyes upon and hopes in our current circumstances. As Ray Stedman notes, “2 Corinthians 4:16-18--and his description of eternity gives us grounds for confidence and courage as we face the trials and pressures of the present time:

'Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.'” [3]

He goes on to write, “Furthermore, the apostle stoutly declares that it is our very trials and hardships which actually produce the glory to come! 'For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all' (2 Corinthians 4:17).

Surely there is a twinkle in Paul's eye when he writes, 'our light and momentary troubles,' in view of what he at a later time describes.

'Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. (2 Corinthians 11:24-27).'” [4]

Paul not only dealt with his tremendously difficult circumstances with overflowing joy, but He also engaged in showing God's kindness to others when they were going through difficulties.

Paul tells the church in Colossians 3:12-13," Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."

God also used Boaz to demonstrate His kindness to Ruth and Naomi in the difficult circumstances. Boaz gave Ruth great favor as she came to glean in his fields, making sure she would not be harmed and would have enough grain as well as water to drink when she was thirsty as she gleaned the fields. As Boaz just happened to be their kinsman redeemer, Boaz redeems the property, keeping all in the name of her dead husband so his name would not be cut off. He also marries Ruth and gives Naomi a grandson who who is in the lineage of Jesus.

When other's go through difficulties and tribulations, God also gives us the opportunity to partner with Him and demonstrate His kindness to others by the way we deal with the situation. Like Boaz who showed such kindness to Ruth in finding her gleaning in his fields, rather than judging someone for their situation, we can extend the branch the sweetens the water in the midst of someone else's pain.

Just as Boaz could have judged Ruth in her vulnerable circumstances as a foreigner, poor, and insignificant, we will always have a choice in how we deal with hardships of others. We can see them as under the judgment of God and deserving of it, we can ignore them and tell ourselves it is not our problem, or we can show mercy and reach out to them like Baoz, extending the kindness of God. Like Ruth in Ruth 2:10, how incredible it can feel to receive kindness when one does not feel worthy or deserving of it.

For myself, I think of when I was pregnant and a young single mom. When I went to church I felt vulnerable and undeserving of kindness. For the most part, I didn't receive it either at the church I went to. Most religious people treated me like I was less than them, looked down on me and shamed me.

I had my son exactly 40 days before my 18^th birthday. When I became pregnant, he gave me purpose and reason for living. Up to that point, I had determined that I was going to commit suicide on my 18^th birthday. I had it planned for years. Becoming pregnant with my son absolutely turned my life around in many incredible ways and set me on a journey that eventually led me to God and much healing.

A little later on as a single mom, when my son was still pretty young, there was one man who treated me differently when I went back to that church for a short season. I still remember his kindness to me. He invited me to be part of a leadership bible study with some leaders in the community and at the church. I never spoke in the bible study because I didn't feel comfortable because I knew so little about the bible but he accommodated for it and still encouraged me to continue to come and listen. It began to set me free to some extent. For that season, He was the kindness of God in my life. He chose to demonstrate the love of God and treat me with respect rather than judge me.

Because of my own experience, I am more sensitive to others who are feeling vulnerable in the same way.  I am more likely to notice a single mom and see the look on her face of awkwardness in religious settings.  I know how it feels so I am more likely to see the need in that situation and partner with God in showing kindness.

Lord, forgive me whenever I have responded wrongly to difficulties and allowed bitterness to creep in.  Be our Joy and give us the strength and courage to respond differently than the world to trials and tribulation. And help us not to miss opportunities to demonstrate your loving-kindness to others who are struggling. Free us from judgment as we partner with you.

1.  Peterson, Eugine. Leap Over A Wall: Earthy Spirituality for Everyday Christians. HarperCollins Publishers, New York, NY. 1997 

2-4.  Stedman, Ray. Authentic Christianity. Located at: http://www.raystedman.org/authentic- christianity. Last Accessed: January 14, 2013.