Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes.

"Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers, and his mother called his name Jabez, saying, 'Because I bore him in pain.' And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, 'Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain.' So God granted him what he requested" (1 Chronicles 4:9-10)

The prayer of Jabez was such a trend for awhile that one couldn't help but cringe a little when they read it. It seemed to be the magic, fix all formula for life. While the hype around the scripture has died down significantly, the verse feel to me like wisdom calling out in one of the oddest places- in a list of names of Judah's descendants.

Jabez had been named by his mother “painful” because she struggled so in pain at his birth. After starting out with being labeled by the pain he caused his mother, he was one who, rather than blame, hate, or become rebellious over his difficult start, turned to God and cried out.

He asked God if He would bless him by exceedingly increasing (rabah, #7235) his limits (gebel, #1366). He invited God to be involved in His life (let your hand be with me). I suppose he thought he had nothing to lose and everything to gain when he was starting out with an identity as a pain. He saw his neediness and God met Him in it.

On the last part of his request, translations vary. In some versions, it says “not cause pain” and others that he would “not experience pain” or “not grieve God.” In any case, perhaps he associated causing his mother such pain with evil and wanted to stay far from it, not causing grief to God like he did to his mother.

Ever have regrets? Maybe even some that had become a label of who you were – your identity?

For myself, I remember when I was a teen I had the label of “trouble.” When I would walk by, sometimes people would make the comment “Here comes trouble.” As a teen I was angry, rebellious and defiant and it defined who I was.

Fortunately, the labels we are given do not need to define our identity. Jabez being labeled by the pain that he caused makes me think of a good friend of mine. When she was born with deformities, she was not fully received as a gift. She was labeled as “deformed.”

It began to define how she went through life and thought about herself. Her boundaries and limits were being set by this label. She saw herself as somehow less than everyone else. She lived within these boundaries and allowed them to define her interactions.

Ever been there? Felt shame and so you shrunk away from others and lost an opportunity to be a part of something. Or you felt little so you put on a huge front and began to pretend. If you could only live the show you put on, you could keep things going without anyone noticing your inner label.

For me, the labels I was holding about myself caused me to lose my voice and hide. I began to hide in crowds and go unnoticed. If I could just fit in and put on a front, conforming to those around me people wouldn't notice what I thought of myself from the years of carrying the labels.

Jabez, someone whose identity was tied to causing pain, prayed to God to to become different. Perhaps it was his regrets or just being tired of hiding in such a label about himself. Either way, His prayers caused him to form a whole new identity: someone honored above his brothers, blessed, and far from causing evil or others pain.

He was someone whose limits were tested and burst forth in new life. Jabez went from a person labeled for causing pain to be known throughout Christian history as most honored among his brothers, blessed by God and far from evil or causing pain!

“Where would I be without someone to save me?” sings.

As for my friend who had the identity as disabled, today she is known by many as a gift. One who was considered a burden upon others is considered a burden bearer to those around her. She ministers to others. God has changed her whole identity. He exceedingly increased her limits. His hand is clearly with her and she is far from burdening anyone.

As for me, God took the label “worthless” and relabeled me “worthwhile.” God sees me as worthwhile and it has changed who I have become. He exceedingly increased my limits as He caused me to stand in a place in a new identity.

While the Jabez prayer may not be a magic formula that will cause one to be 'blessed' in some superficial way, it is a continually repeated pattern throughout history. God hears the cries of the brokenhearted who have been mislabeled by their past and gives them a new name. He sees who we are made to be. And when we call out to Him, He is there ready to exceedingly increase our limits and give us a new name.

Isn't He amazing?!