"Going through the motions doesn’t please you, a flawless performance is nothing to you. I learned God-worship when my pride was shattered. Heart-shattered lives ready for love don’t for a moment escape God’s notice."
Job went through significant loss in a
very short period of time. He lost his livestock, servants, and
children. Then before he could recover, his health was attacked and
he was struck with painful boils Job 1:1-2:8). The pain and grief
had to be immense for him.
Job, after going back and forth with
his friends looking to defend himself and his righteousness (as
well as sharing his feelings of misery with them), he begins to
share with friends some of his heart of grief for all the losses.
In Job 29 he shares some of his grief
related to his loss of his position of respect as a leader that
everyone looked to for answers. He seemed to be deeply mourning his
loss of significance. This was probably made stronger by the fact
his friends were treating him disrespectfully and looking down upon
him. How far he had fallen from the pedestal people had put him on.
What I longed to see more of in Job's
words were to hear more grief around the loss of relationship with
his family and servants. The things that he missed about them, the
precious moments that were and would never again be. I longed to see
demonstrated a greater depth of his relationships reflected.
What we know about his kids is that
they loved to party with each other and afterwords, Job would send
for them in order to cleans them from sin by sacrifices and offerings
(Job 1:5). Other than this, there is little spoken about their
relationship with their father.
I also longed to see a different
response from his wife. There didn't seem to be a lot of love and
respect demonstrated by his wife or comforting of each other in their
mourning. His wife seemed to be terribly bitter towards him. As he
was mourning, she lashes out at him and responds, “Are you still
holding to your principles? Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9)
Bitterness usually happens over time
from repeated emotional withdrawals in the relationship. Could this
be a reflection of Jobs relationships with his family? It is hard to
tell from the limited text. But what is known, possibly the
relationships Job had with his family were superficial and focused on
his principles and him looking good at the gate. Perhaps in his
self-righteousness and desire for significance, he sacrificed what he
could have had with his family to look good to others on the outside.
In the same way, Job's relationship
with God seemed to be superficial to some extent. In Job 42:5 he
proclaims, “I had heard about you with my own ears, but now I have
seen you with my own eyes.” This implies that up until that point
of brokenness, he had only known about God rather than have a
relationship with Him.
Makes me think of some life stories I
have heard on occasion about children of pastors who were bitter
about their family relationships, the pressure to look good in front
of the people, and the superficiality of the Christianity they saw
demonstrated in their own household.
While I don't think this happens often,
I knew a young man that said he was so turned off by all of the
pretending and pressure to look good to others, he totally walked
away from God. He wanted nothing to do with religion at all. He saw
his father who was a pastor as a self-righteous hypocrite.
In Job's self-righteousness, it seems
he could have possibly missed out on what he could have had with his
family. He may have lived out his principles but failed to live in
brokenness towards his sin and an overflow of God's love.
In self-righteousness and sufficiency,
we may think that we have a tremendous amount to offer the people
around us. Job reflects this belief about himself in Job 29.
However, in our own abilities, our actions lack the true fruit of
love that brings life to those around us.
John 15:4 says, “No branch can bear
fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear
fruit unless you remain in me."
We may go through all the motions of
loving others and doing what is right, but our love is filled with
hooks when we do it in our own strength. We have underlying motives
of getting some need met out if it. We can only give away what we
actually have tasted and experienced for ourselves. If we lack
experiencing genuine unconditional love, we cannot give it to others.
What if Job rather than pointing out his family's sin and looking for them to live by his principles, he began to confess his own sin and weaknesses in brokenness for his lack of capacity within himself to love them well?
It is in our brokenness and meeting us
in our weaknesses that God demonstrates His glory, not in our
perfection or doing it ourselves. 2 Cor. 4:7 says, “But we have
this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power
is from God and not from us.”
It was not perfection or offerings that
God desired from Job. He was looking for his brokenness.
Psalm 51: 16-17 says,
a broken and contrite heart you,
God, will not despise.
If Job would have continued down the
same path undisturbed, more than likely he would not have came to a place of
brokenness and willingness to change. It was through suffering and
difficulty that God brought Job to a place of brokenness and
repentance.
God was not seeking his harm but that
Job would have real life rather than the self-righteous and
superficial one he was living. We are all familiar with Jeremiah
29:11. The Lord speaks, “For I know the plans I have for you,
declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a
future and a hope.”
And when our lives our a mess and we
come to a place of brokenness, God meets us there. He does not
leave us in our lack or mess out of a desire to see us suffer. Like
the prodigal son, He puts the ring on our finger and fully
establishes us in our inheritance no matter how undeserving or how we
have squandered our lives.
The Lord says in Joel 2:25-26, “I
will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the
hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent
among you. 'You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the
name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you. And my
people shall never again be put to shame.'”
Over and over in the Bible, restoration
is spoken of and demonstrated. In Zech 9:12 he prophesies, “Return
to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope; today I declare that I will
restore to you double.”
This restoration was demonstrated with
Job in God blessing the latter years of his life more than the
earlier years. His livestock, servants, finances and children were
restored. He lived until a very old age getting to see his
great-grandchildren. (Job 42:10-16).
Often it is when we lose (or risk
losing) something and it is restored that we value it the most. Ever
notice this? For instance, you don't appreciate having legs or
getting around but if you went into the doctor and they had to
consider cutting off one of your legs but managed to spare it at the
last moment, you would greatly appreciate having it.
The next day when you are walking, you
would be deeply rejoicing for having legs to walk on. I imagine
that Job lived with a deeper appreciation of his family after having
experienced the loss of his children.
Rather than being in a hurry to get to
the gate to conduct business, he probably slowed down and took extra
time to look his kids in the eye, hear what they had on their hearts
and tell them what treasures they are before he left for the day.
He probably took the time to have the depth of relationship with each
of them that he may have lacked the first time around.
We shouldn't assume that we can put off
the important things for tomorrow when we have more time. Proverbs 27:1
says, “Don't brag about tomorrow, since you don't know what the day
will bring.”
We can spend too much of our time in the places that seem to urgently be pulling at our attention while thinking we always have tomorrow for the less urgent matters. Sometimes, like Job, these things are connected to our own significance.
An example in my life is calling my
husband during my workday to touch base. When I really think about
it, something that is very worthwhile is to spend time to call my
husband every day around lunch just to check in and see how he is doing,
reminding him of how important he is in my life. However, I get
pulled in many directions at my job. Often I miss this opportunity.
I just feel too busy and totally forget or don't take the time to
stop and call him because I feel the pressure to get more done.
Taking time to share our hearts, making
emotional deposits in our spouses and telling those closest to us
what a treasure they are do not clamor as much sometimes for our
attention. However, they are the things that really matter most.
Lord, help us and show us how to be
more intentional in our important relationships. Help us to make
these relationships our top priority and to treasure them as if today
may be our last day to enjoy them. Wherever we may be going through
the motions or loving in our own strength, bring us back to a place
of brokenness that we may have your love and life flowing through us to our
families.
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