"Going through the motions doesn’t please you, a flawless performance is nothing to you. I learned God-worship when my pride was shattered. Heart-shattered lives ready for love don’t for a moment escape God’s notice."

Job went through significant loss in a very short period of time. He lost his livestock, servants, and children. Then before he could recover, his health was attacked and he was struck with painful boils Job 1:1-2:8). The pain and grief had to be immense for him.

Job, after going back and forth with his friends looking to defend himself and his righteousness (as well as sharing his feelings of misery with them), he begins to share with friends some of his heart of grief for all the losses.

In Job 29 he shares some of his grief related to his loss of his position of respect as a leader that everyone looked to for answers. He seemed to be deeply mourning his loss of significance. This was probably made stronger by the fact his friends were treating him disrespectfully and looking down upon him. How far he had fallen from the pedestal people had put him on.

What I longed to see more of in Job's words were to hear more grief around the loss of relationship with his family and servants. The things that he missed about them, the precious moments that were and would never again be. I longed to see demonstrated a greater depth of his relationships reflected.

What we know about his kids is that they loved to party with each other and afterwords, Job would send for them in order to cleans them from sin by sacrifices and offerings (Job 1:5). Other than this, there is little spoken about their relationship with their father.

I also longed to see a different response from his wife. There didn't seem to be a lot of love and respect demonstrated by his wife or comforting of each other in their mourning. His wife seemed to be terribly bitter towards him. As he was mourning, she lashes out at him and responds, “Are you still holding to your principles? Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9)

Bitterness usually happens over time from repeated emotional withdrawals in the relationship. Could this be a reflection of Jobs relationships with his family? It is hard to tell from the limited text. But what is known, possibly the relationships Job had with his family were superficial and focused on his principles and him looking good at the gate. Perhaps in his self-righteousness and desire for significance, he sacrificed what he could have had with his family to look good to others on the outside.

In the same way, Job's relationship with God seemed to be superficial to some extent. In Job 42:5 he proclaims, “I had heard about you with my own ears, but now I have seen you with my own eyes.” This implies that up until that point of brokenness, he had only known about God rather than have a relationship with Him.

Makes me think of some life stories I have heard on occasion about children of pastors who were bitter about their family relationships, the pressure to look good in front of the people, and the superficiality of the Christianity they saw demonstrated in their own household.

While I don't think this happens often, I knew a young man that said he was so turned off by all of the pretending and pressure to look good to others, he totally walked away from God. He wanted nothing to do with religion at all. He saw his father who was a pastor as a self-righteous hypocrite.

In Job's self-righteousness, it seems he could have possibly missed out on what he could have had with his family. He may have lived out his principles but failed to live in brokenness towards his sin and an overflow of God's love.

In self-righteousness and sufficiency, we may think that we have a tremendous amount to offer the people around us. Job reflects this belief about himself in Job 29. However, in our own abilities, our actions lack the true fruit of love that brings life to those around us.

John 15:4 says, “No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me."

We may go through all the motions of loving others and doing what is right, but our love is filled with hooks when we do it in our own strength. We have underlying motives of getting some need met out if it. We can only give away what we actually have tasted and experienced for ourselves. If we lack experiencing genuine unconditional love, we cannot give it to others.

What if Job rather than pointing out his family's sin and looking for them to live by his principles, he began to confess his own sin and weaknesses in brokenness for his lack of capacity within himself to love them well?  

It is in our brokenness and meeting us in our weaknesses that God demonstrates His glory, not in our perfection or doing it ourselves. 2 Cor. 4:7 says, “But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.”

It was not perfection or offerings that God desired from Job. He was looking for his brokenness.

Psalm 51: 16-17 says,
You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit;  
 a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise. 

If Job would have continued down the same path undisturbed, more than likely he would not have came to a place of brokenness and willingness to change. It was through suffering and difficulty that God brought Job to a place of brokenness and repentance.

God was not seeking his harm but that Job would have real life rather than the self-righteous and superficial one he was living. We are all familiar with Jeremiah 29:11. The Lord speaks, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

And when our lives our a mess and we come to a place of brokenness, God meets us there. He does not leave us in our lack or mess out of a desire to see us suffer. Like the prodigal son, He puts the ring on our finger and fully establishes us in our inheritance no matter how undeserving or how we have squandered our lives.

The Lord says in Joel 2:25-26, “I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you. 'You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you. And my people shall never again be put to shame.'”

Over and over in the Bible, restoration is spoken of and demonstrated. In Zech 9:12 he prophesies, “Return to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope; today I declare that I will restore to you double.”

This restoration was demonstrated with Job in God blessing the latter years of his life more than the earlier years. His livestock, servants, finances and children were restored. He lived until a very old age getting to see his great-grandchildren. (Job 42:10-16).

Often it is when we lose (or risk losing) something and it is restored that we value it the most. Ever notice this? For instance, you don't appreciate having legs or getting around but if you went into the doctor and they had to consider cutting off one of your legs but managed to spare it at the last moment, you would greatly appreciate having it.

The next day when you are walking, you would be deeply rejoicing for having legs to walk on. I imagine that Job lived with a deeper appreciation of his family after having experienced the loss of his children.

Rather than being in a hurry to get to the gate to conduct business, he probably slowed down and took extra time to look his kids in the eye, hear what they had on their hearts and tell them what treasures they are before he left for the day. He probably took the time to have the depth of relationship with each of them that he may have lacked the first time around.

We shouldn't assume that we can put off the important things for tomorrow when we have more time. Proverbs 27:1 says, “Don't brag about tomorrow, since you don't know what the day will bring.”

We can spend too much of our time in the places that seem to urgently be pulling at our attention while thinking we always have tomorrow for the less urgent matters. Sometimes, like Job, these things are connected to our own significance.

An example in my life is calling my husband during my workday to touch base. When I really think about it, something that is very worthwhile is to spend time to call my husband every day around lunch just to check in and see how he is doing, reminding him of how important he is in my life. However, I get pulled in many directions at my job. Often I miss this opportunity. I just feel too busy and totally forget or don't take the time to stop and call him because I feel the pressure to get more done.

Taking time to share our hearts, making emotional deposits in our spouses and telling those closest to us what a treasure they are do not clamor as much sometimes for our attention. However, they are the things that really matter most.

Lord, help us and show us how to be more intentional in our important relationships. Help us to make these relationships our top priority and to treasure them as if today may be our last day to enjoy them. Wherever we may be going through the motions or loving in our own strength, bring us back to a place of brokenness that we may have your love and life flowing through us to our families.



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