Wisdom shouts in the streets. She cries out in the public square.

Reflections on Proverbs 1 - 3

Wisdom is not something that we gain as we run into life full force.   It is a process of reflection.   It is perceived in the meaning of sayings, gleaned from understanding and deep meaning in difficulties, and hidden in the riddles of the simplicities beyond the complexities of life.

We are to glean wisdom from life.  As we age, I believe our bodies are even designed to glean greater amounts of wisdom upon reflection.   Proverbs 16:31 says, “White hair is a crown of glory, if it is found in the way of righteousness.”

When we are young, we have tons of energy.   Our bodies want to go, go, go and we are designed to experience life.   We go from one thing to the next, putting our hands, hearts and minds to our activities and gleaning experience.   As we age, we grow in our understanding of our strengths and weaknesses.  We learn how to use them for our advantage and so gain experience and capacity to produce.   Our lives usually hit a peak around 40-50ish where we find the most effective use of our giftings and a place to use them that fills our hearts with meaning and purpose.  It seems we are in “the zone” in that season of our life. 

Then slowly, something begins to happen to our mind and body.   We begin to become more tired, our minds slow down, we forget easier.   As we hit our later years, we find we must begin to give up some things.  We just cannot do as much.  At some point, we retire and our lives slow down to that which we love most and give us the most meaning.  

I watched my mom go through this season in her life.  She no longer could keep her house as it was too much to maintain after she fell and hurt herself.  One day, at a doctor appointment, she looked over at me, started crying and said, “I will never be able to drive again.”   It was a hard thing for her to accept.  It was also hard to sell her home and move into Assisted Living.  While she was under high care, she even had to ask permission to go to church.  Her health, her home, her freedom to drive, and even her freedom to choose on her own were losses.   But each step of the way, she said yes. She did not spurn wisdom and discipline (Proverbs 1:7).  And, each step of the way, she has grown in wisdom.

Wisdom is reflected not in what we know, but who we are.  In growing in wisdom, we look more like Christ.  Proverbs 1:7 says the fear of Yahweh is the beginning of knowledge.    And Provers 1:3 says that an enlightened attitude of mind results in virtue, justice and fair dealing.  

Since my mother fell and broke her back in Assisted Living, she moved in with me.  She spends her days while I am at work napping, watching some TV, praying and reflecting.   Her body has adjusted to the season of her life.  She is preparing to go on to the next life and is gleaning from her experiences.

My mother is the kindest little old lady you could ever meet.  She has an absolutely sweet countenance and when she comes into a room, people naturally turn to greet her.  When I bring her to church, sometimes strangers will come sit with us because they meet my mom and it somehow impacts them.   They start telling her everything about their lives.  She sits there holding their hand and listing with loving attentiveness.   Everyone has value in her eyes.   

This wisdom has been gleaned from her reflection over her life.  This wisdom has come from loving acceptance and trust in her life as she experienced difficulty after difficulty and loss after loss.   Ultimately, her wisdom has came from her relationship with Christ. 

So, is it difficulty and loss or time of reflection that create wisdom?   I believe both together grow wisdom in us as we look to Christ (the source of wisdom).  If we do not experience difficulties or loss, like Job in the Bible, it is difficult to have true empathy for others.  We somehow fault them for their failures or trials.  But without reflection and acceptance, our trials only bring blame, bitterness and sourness of soul.   They result in loss rather than gain.

My husband went through a season of significant loss.  Some years ago, he was told he had a rare eye disease called Retinitis Pigmentosa.     It causes one’s vision to close in on them and creates blindness for which there is no cure.  

First there was the fear to work through.   There was also the looks and glances to deal with from those who compared themselves to us and saw my husband as something less because of his vision.   Then there was the fight to remain trusting and hopeful in the face of very negative reports by doctors.  Then came the loss of his job as they began to see him as a risk and the loss of his license when he could no longer see well enough to drive.  

First my husband started out by taking more workable jobs that were close to home where he could get to them by other means that driving.   As the work was not what he was expecting, this was discouraging for him.  But as we explored our hearts, we decided to reach out in faith to consider foster parenting. 

As we started foster parenting, we found rich meaning and purpose in it.   Then when life did not work out for the boy we were fostering as anticipated (his mom and dad left), we ended up moving towards adopting him.   We also adopted his younger brother. 

A year or so later, my mother fell, broke her back and moved in with us.   Now my husband finds rich meaning in being an incredible dad and caregiver to my mother during the days.   Rather than becoming bitter and angry, he said yes.   As he has said yes over and over to reaching out and helping others in their deep places of need, he has grown in such empathy and wisdom.   His difficulties and losses have forged in him such wisdom.

Yet, difficulty does not always forge wisdom just as time does not always forge wisdom.  It is ultimately the yes in our hearts to accept and grow in wisdom, as we reflect on our losses.   Working at a Crisis Line for some years, I had the opportunity to experience several people who chose a different path.  Their losses resulted in anger, depression, bitterness and stubbornness.   Sometimes, we would get the same callers week after week, month after month, year after year.  They would talk about the same childhood issue with such anger and resentment.  They were unwilling to glean from it and let it go so they were stuck.

My littlest when he came to me was stuck in anger.   He had been diagnosed with ODD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, and RAD, Reactive Attachment Disorder.   What it means is that he refused to listen. He was tired of being tossed around and having people give up on him.  He was deeply angry and ready to make all his decisions for himself. He needed no help from adults.  However, just turning five, he had no tools to make decisions so it was a total disaster for him.   He acted as a fool at every turn when he went in the opposite direction of how we instructed him.  This only left him more frustrated and angry at himself and others.

Proverbs 1:8 says, “Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction, do not reject your mother’s teaching; they will be a crown of grace for your head, a circlet for your neck.”   In humbly listening to those who love us and following their instruction as they care for us, we learn to live rightly even at a young age.   Beyond difficulty and our own reflection, we glean wisdom from others.   As they share their experiences with us, we gain from their difficulties, understanding and reflection.   The wisest young people I know have deeply valued what others can provide them in knowledge and understanding.  

Living in our family and with his brother, over time my littlest came to realize that we want the best for him and have wisdom to give to him.  He has learned that by following our guidance and direction, he can succeed.   Like any little boy, while his initial thought on occasion is still to totally ignore us, when he stops and thinks for a second, he changes his course.

The book of Proverbs is designed to slow us down and cause us to reflect.  It is also designed to share the wisdom of experience that can be passed on.  In walking along her path, we find life, freedom and peace.  

Wisdom is a treasure to seek.  Yet it is everywhere – it calls out to us at every turn.  At every corner it can be heard.   No one can say, “wisdom was hidden from me.”   Wisdom is available to all.  It is freely provided to all that willingly seek after it.

It is not that we do not hear the voice of wisdom calling out with the direction to go and we are left groping in the darkness to make our own way.  Rather, like my littlest, we sometimes choose a different path – the path of ignorance and foolishness.

At times, we refuse wisdom when she calls.  We do not humbly take notice of her ways.  We ignore and disregard her advice.  Other times, we are just complacent.  Our disobedience is a going along a path without giving thought to the consequences.  We may even play ignorant when we really are closing our ears to the truth because we don’t want to hear it.  When we do this, sometimes, like with my littlest, it is a disaster for us. 

On certain things the book of Wisdom just spells them out directly as a warning not to do them.  Don’t be seduced, do not accept dishonest gain, don’t follow a path that is crooked and deceitful.  Don’t cause harm to others who trustingly work with you or live by you.

It also warns us of the fruit of wrong choices.  Wisdom tells us that we will bring calamity on ourselves, it may cause a storm, whirlwind or disaster.  The result will be anguish, ruin and ultimately lead to death.   The wages of sin is death.  It ruins us.  Rather than leading us to a life that is full, abundant and joy filled, our lives are full of despair, fear and barrenness.

I have heard it spoken by some popular motivational speakers on different occasions, “You are exactly where you made yourself to be in life.”  It was used in this way as an encouragement to make right choices.  I totally disagree with this.  Tell this to a 4 year old whose mom and dad abandoned him and has repercussions to work through from neglect.  However, I do believe that the state of our hearts are the fruit of our choices, thoughts and attitudes.   We are becoming who we daily choose to be by our actions.

When we humbly listen to the voice of wisdom and chooser her ways, we will live securely and in peace.   He will be as a shield to us even when things go wrong.   We will grow in virtue, justice and fair dealing.  As we allow wisdom into our choices, prudence and discernment will become our guides.  We will become increasingly thoughtful in the choices we make.  Our capacity to make right choices grows.

The path of righteousness grows ever brighter.  Even in mistakes, the path leads to happiness and joy.  The teaching and principles of the virtuous that went before us and gleaned from our experience, will guide us into greater and greater life.  We will have more meaning and fullness in our lives.