The Great Orchastrator
“So Absalom went to Hebron. But while he was there, he sent secret messengers to all the tribes of Israel to stir up a rebellion against the king. “As soon as you hear the ram’s horn,” his message read, “you are to say, ‘Absalom has been crowned king in Hebron.” He took 200 men from Jerusalem with him as guests, but they knew nothing of his intentions.” (2 Samuel 15:9-11)
Absalom went to Hebron under the guise of completing a vow to the Lord to sacrifice to Him for being brought back to Jerusalem by David. Then, he invited many unsuspecting people into his plot and gathered Ahithophel, one of David’s counselors. Many others joined the conspiracy, and it gained momentum.
When the news came back to David, the messenger informed him that “All Israel” had joined the conspiracy against him. (2 Samuel 15:13). Because of this report, David left his concubines and abandoned his position. He fled from his son Absalom and ran.
Later on, another counselor for David, Hushai, went to go with David as he fled his position. David sent him back and asked him to frustrate Ahithophel’s advice. Hushai then proceeded to undermine Ahithophel’s advice and got the king to go in a different direction. As a result, Ahithophel learns his advice was not heeded. Since Ahithophel had betrayed David to help Absalom, he feels his career is ruined, and he goes off and commits suicide.
There are so many moving parts to this story. This conspiracy ends with Absalom, following Hushai’s advice, hanging from a tree branch by his hair as he tries to lead the military to battle himself. Joab took advantage of the opportunity and killed him, ending the bloodshed of the troops and breaking David’s heart for the death of his son.
In every twist of this story, doesn’t it seem that you could say, “if only?” If only David would have realized that “All Israel” was not against him. If only Absalom would have listened to Ahithophel’s advice. If only David and Absalom could have worked out their differences in a different way.
Ever look at your circumstances in this way? If only I did this, or if only they supported me in that; if only this person who is giving me trouble would stop and see things differently. We want to control our circumstances to have them go our way.
It is also easy to add a twist of blame in these situations. David may have been thinking, “If only Joab had listened and shown care for Absalom, he would be alive, and my life would be different.” Never mind that David had never addressed the issue with Tamar or the conflict with Absalom before it got so far.
When we look to manage or control our circumstances, it will always feel like shifting sand. There is nothing firm or solid that we can hold onto. Someone will somehow, even with the best intentions, not get something right, get in the way and blow our ideal plan.
We also do this to ourselves. Ever “should” on yourself? We say to ourselves, “I should have done this.” Or, “If I would have just said that.” We think to ourselves, “If I would have got this right, it would have changed this situation.”
All of this has to do with control as well. We are blaming someone- ourselves. Then we (okay me) may beat ourselves up over not getting it right. We hope to learn and do better.
I love that the message at our church last week was about surrendering control. This is an area that, for myself, I need to continue to work on. I need to pry my fingers out of trying to take charge of the situations and look at the maker of the situations.
God is our firm foundation. Rather than try to manipulate and control our circumstances, we look to the Rock that is never changing or shifting, and surrender control to him. In giving Him permission to orchestrate our lives, all our circumstances, good or bad, become worship to Him.
I once had a dream about this pastor I knew; in the dream, he was playing all these instruments. As he did, there were blue hues and worship that were going up to God from it. It was beautiful and amazing. I asked God what he was doing, and God said, “He is creating a symphony of worship.” I never forgot this as I longed to do this myself.
Our lives are meant to be worship to God. This requires some letting go of control and denying ourselves. Given this, here are some things that I can remember from these situations:
When my eyes are on recognition, standing out, or being seen, I am going to feel a sense of frustration and lack. My eyes are on the wrong things. It is about me being the center rather than God, and it will always lead me in the wrong direction.
Focusing on myself or my gains/wins will lead to dissatisfaction. Even in gains, I will feel like I have to continue making them, leaving me dissatisfied and even competitive and comparing.
Our lives are not meant to be obtained but to be lived out as a dance, or partnership, with our creator where we express His love to everyone around us. I will feel like I have to continue to make them, so I can never be satisfied.
We cannot grasp. We need to live with our hands wide open. When we receive something from God, we offer it back up to Him as worship. Recently, when I was deeply wounded by someone, I wanted back some control. I wanted them to pay, I wanted to shut down, and I wanted to have control going forward. I just found myself praying, “unfurl my hands, Lord.”
In all things, glorifying God is the ultimate goal. We miss the whole point if we slight someone else along the way. Our goal is to surrender to God and be led by His Spirit. Our goal is to do what will bring Him the most glory.
Enter into what God is doing. Instead of focusing on getting our circumstances right, we need to focus on getting our relationship and connection with God right. As we put Him first and look to glorify Him, He will lead us through our circumstances.
Another thing that it brings to heart is not taking ourselves too seriously. We need to be able to laugh at ourselves and take ourselves lightly. If Ahithophel could have taken himself lightly in light of God, he wouldn’t have gotten so caught up in having his advice heeded. He could have just let go of it. Maybe “self” getting in the way was the whole reason that he betrayed David. Perhaps he didn’t feel as valued by David as initially by Absalom when he was trying to gain his father’s power.
Letting go. My boy turned 18, and I have been working on connecting him with his biological mom. Also, with the ministry program I run, I feel God nudging me to let a few other leaders contribute while trusting God with the overall ownership of it.
I don’t have to figure it all out and understand the whys. I like to feel like I understand what God is doing and why He is doing it. However, what He is asking of me is to follow and be obedient. This comes from a place of trusting obedience, whether I understand or not.
All of these have to do with letting go of control and letting God lead. The antidote to the self-life is denial of it. In a book by Andrew Murray called “Absolute Surrender,” he challenges that the self-life is a significant hindrance to being led by the Spirit and walking in His power. He asks if we are willing to surrender everything to the Lord.
He writes, “Are you saying, “This is my problem; it is always the self-life, the self-comfort, the self-consciousness, the self-pleasing, and the self-will; how can I free myself from it? The only answer is: Christ Jesus can free you; Christ Jesus can deliver you from the power of self. He only asks that you humble yourself before Him.” [1]
The Great Orchestrator
The Lord orchestrates our circumstances and empowers us so that we can choose to surrender and worship Him while denying ourselves. He makes us able, out of trust, to lean back into the situations and invite Him to take control. In this, we will see His purposes, power, and plans come forth. As I mentioned, it is more of a dance where we lean into the Holy Spirit and let Him lead.
We see this with Ananias as he went to Street Streight and laid hands on Paul. He was completely led by the Spirit. While he was personally afraid, as Paul had killed many Christians, he surrendered and followed the Spirit’s leading.
We can also deny His power and continue to put ourselves first. We can slug through life trying to use our personal power, influence, dominance, or manipulation to obtain what we want. But if we do, we will end up miserable as the ground under us shifts with circumstances, and so we will never seem able to sustain happiness.
Lord Jesus, we do ask for your help. We humble ourselves before you and ask that you would help us to get freedom from the self-life. Help us to walk in your love and power and not gratify the desires of the flesh. Let our lives be a symphony or worship and not handfuls of grasping for purpose and control.
1. Murray, Andrew. Absolute Surrender. Bethany House Publishers, Minneapolis, MN. 1985, 2003.
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